Most people want to love and to be loved. But experience has shown that when they go into a relationship, they take it for granted and do nothing to improve on it.
Relationships need maintenance. Just as your car needs regular maintenance to keep it in a good condition, so you need constant maintenance of your relationships.
If you wish to have good and healthy relationships with your loved ones or with anyone else, you should avoid doing anything that might spoil them. You need to take good care of them constantly.
In this series, we shall be looking at certain relationship goals as suggested by Remez Sasson, that will make your love stronger.
According to Sasson, there are certain simple steps you need to follow, in order to maintain every kind of relationship, with your loved ones, family, coworkers, neighbors and other people.
He noted that certain kinds of relationships require a different approach, since a relationship between lovers is different from a relationship between coworkers or neighbors.
Below, you will find Sasson’s tips on setting relationship goals to help you improve your relationships, keep your love strong, and make your partner happy.
Focus on each relationship goal, think about it, and find ways to achieve it.
Communication is one of the most important keys to keep in mind.
Good and open communication should be one of your top goals, as well as being open and honest.
Talking, expressing your opinions, and allowing the other person express his or her opinions are important. Listening and understanding what your partner says is important.
Sometimes, you might not agree with what your partner says, but you need to listen and keep good relations, even if you do not agree to what is being said.
Talking with your partner about your feelings and allowing him or her to talk about theirs is an important step to avoid resentments, anger and misunderstandings. This can lead to better and healthier relationships and to a stronger emotional bond.
2. Make sure you understand each other
Make sure you understand each other. Often, relationships are spoiled due to misunderstanding, misinterpretation, or not listening.
Sometimes, a person carries a grudge for years, when the other person did not intend to hurt. The partner might not even be aware that he or she said or did anything to hurt the other person.
Be sure to understand what your partner, colleague or friend said. Always listen, talk and ask questions to make things clear.
Making the effort to understand what your partner is saying should be one of your foremost relationship goals.
Pay attention to the tone of the voice, the body language, and of course, to the words said. Ask questions and answer the questions asked. If something is not clear, be sure to discuss it.
3. When possible, avoid arguments
Arguments and disagreement are unavoidable, but if you use tact and common sense, and do not let your ego go to the front, you can ultimately settle every misunderstanding.
Arguing is a normal and healthy part of any relationship, but be careful not to hurt the other party, or say and do things that would be difficult to take back.
Even in arguments, it is possible to speak with kindness and love.
4. Avoid anger
Avoid getting angry and impatient. This might be not so easy sometimes, but remember, this is someone close to you that you are hurting. Do you really want to do that?
Shouting, raising the voice and saying some not so nice things can break a relationship. Avoiding anger must be one of your relationship goals.
You can for example:
Count from 1 to 10 before reacting.
Drink a glass of water.
Try to understand your partner.
Change the subject and talk about other matters.
Focus for similarities, not on differences in your opinions and thoughts.
These are a few things that can help you can avoid getting angry.
One the main keys for maintaining a good and loving bond between people is forgiveness. For most people this is a tough goal, which they need to handle.
When something is tough and uneasy, it does not mean that you have to leave it. On the contrary, it means that it is most important in your life, and you need to deal with it.
People often say things we do not like to hear. Often, this is not intended at all, and there was no nasty or vicious desire behind the act, but we find it difficult to forgive.
One of the most important relationship goals should be the ability to forgive.
“Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.”
– Marianne Williamson
Continue in Part 2 of this article